Are you considering becoming a foster parent but don’t know what it entails? Do you currently foster children with difficult backgrounds and are seeking ways to understand them? Or are you a former foster child trying to make sense of your upbringing? When it comes to foster care, there are plenty of topics to unpack and not necessarily a whole bunch of places to do so. But there are a lot of books that can help answer questions, present experiences in the system, provide insights from seasoned foster carers, and guide us through the process.
This article features expert recommendations for the most insightful and empowering foster care books to read this 2024. The titles found here cover key topics like trauma, attachment, discipline, emotional intelligence, identity, and advocacy. Whether you’re a new or experienced foster parent or you’re a former foster kid, these books will deepen your empathy and understanding of the children in the system, as well as provide tools to heal them and yourself.
Read on for the top must-read foster care books that will make a difference in 2024.
Foster Care Books for 2024
How To Talk So Kids Will Listen And Listen So Kids Will Talk (Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish)
This classic parenting book, written by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish, was originally published in 1980 but remains highly relevant today. The book focuses on improving parent-child communication by acting as a personal workshop. The authors expose common parenting issues and provide practical tips and strategies for interacting with children in a way that fosters openness, respect, and mutual understanding. Some of the themes explored include using empathy to validate children’s feelings, avoiding unhelpful language patterns, and giving children choices and encouragement to participate in solutions.
Parenting From The Inside Out (Daniel J. Siegel and Mary Hartzell)
Parenting From The Inside Out is a book focused on parents with background knowledge that helps them understand how their own upbringing shapes the way they parent. The authors draw on findings in neurobiology and attachment theory to guide parents through their childhood experiences into their current coping mechanisms. The book is an insightful read that shows parents the science behind their parenting style and allows them to gain critical self-awareness. This book provides an excellent framework for foster parents to do their own inner work in order to be able to show up fully for their foster kids.
The Body Keeps The Score (Bessel van der Kolk)
The Body Keeps The Score by Bessel van der Kolk is an essential read for understanding trauma and its impacts on foster care children. Published in 2014, this book has become foundational in the field of trauma therapy and care. With its incredible insight, the book showcases how even after the traumatic events are over, the trauma continues to live in the body. It also explores how ongoing trauma damages development in the brain and explores therapeutic approaches that engage the body to help trauma survivors heal. Overall, this must-read guides foster parents in understanding the trauma experienced by children and youth while providing informed nurturing and advocacy for mental health.
Keep the Doors Open (Kristin Berry)
Written by Kristin Berry, “Keep the Doors Open” is a compelling book that gives prospective parents a glimpse into what it’s like to be a foster parent. The author shares her personal experiences as a foster mom with all the realities of hurriedly preparing a room for a child, the first meeting as you welcome the child to your home, the hurt of saying goodbye, and what it means to leave your doors open. This raw and inspiring story of a foster family’s first year in the fostering community serves as an encouragement for individuals to keep the doors to their homes and hearts wide open and give children in need a chance at a loving home.
The Grown-Up’s Guide to Teenage Humans (Josh Ship)
With so many books focusing on children and not enough on teenagers, this award-winning book comes as a bucket of fresh air and much-needed guidance. Author Josh Ship understands the teenage mind and gives parents the key to unlocking it. By decoding their behavior, parents are able to nurture trust and respect and help their teenagers thrive on the road to adulthood. Research-based and full of humor, “The Grown-Up’s Guide to Teenage Humans” is a practical and easy book that can help foster parents comprehend the brain and behavior of the foster youth under their care.
The Whole Brain Child (Daniel J. J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson)
This 2011 book written by Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson became a must-read for foster parents, thanks to its science-based strategies for connecting with children and supporting healthy brain development. The book explains how a child’s brain functions and matures, offers practical tools and techniques for calming an upset child as well as discipline strategies and teaches connection through empathy, insight, and brain integration. Parents claim the book has allowed them to navigate their child’s challenges with ease, helping them regulate emotional meltdowns, create meaningful connections, and teach important life skills.
The Connected Child (Karyn B. Purvis and David R. Cross)
Although “The Connected Child” is more directed towards adoptive parents, the book is an excellent resource for any parent that wishes to connect more with their child. This book provides trauma-informed parenting strategies that focus on establishing trust, helping children feel safe, and creating a nurturing environment. If you are fostering a child from a different country or culture or one that has a troubled background or has special needs, this book is for you. The book outlines ways to respond to children’s negative behaviors with compassion while still providing structure and consistency. The Connected Child is recommended for the invaluable advice it offers foster and adoptive families.
Fifty One Moves (Ben Ashcroft)
The memoir “Fifty One Moves” is a testament to the importance of caring for a vulnerable child, showing them affection, and giving them space to process their thoughts and emotions safely. The author, Ben Ashcroft, speaks from personal experience about what it’s like to go through 51 placements in the foster care system in the span of 6 years. In his book, Ashcroft recounts the trauma of his neglected childhood, one that led him into penal custody, and how he eventually managed to turn his life around for the better. An inspiring story of a former foster child, “Fifty One Moves” demonstrates that no matter the hardships, cycles can be broken and encourages readers to never give up.
Three Little Words (Ashley Rhodes-Courter)
Published in 2008, “Three Little Words” is the memoir of Ashley Rhodes-Courter, a woman who spent over nine years in fourteen different foster homes. Her story provides raw, emotional insight into the life of a child navigating the foster care system. Not all foster kids go through the same experiences, but this impactful true story shines a light on the struggles many of them face. Ashley’s memoir enables readers to empathize with the pain, fear, and confusion that foster children go through which is why her story is a must-read this 2024 for any foster parent out there.
Foster the Family (Jamie C. Finn)
“Foster the Family” by Jamie C. Finn is a book that offers encouragement, hope, and practical guidance specifically tailored for Christian foster parents. Through the lens of her own experiences as a fellow foster parent, Finn provides insights infused with biblical truths to help foster parents navigate the challenges and rewards of fostering children. The book emphasizes the importance of faith, compassion, and understanding in the foster care journey. Jamie’s wisdom and knowledge of the Word of God help foster parents and prospective foster parents feel seen and understood while encouraging them to hold on to their faith and what they were called to do.
Conclusion
From trauma-informed care to child development, memoirs, and even foster parent experiences, this reading list is a powerful reminder that understanding leads to action and healing. Those wishing to deeply understand the foster care community in 2024 would do well to explore several or all of these expert-recommended books. The perspectives within will lead you to greater empathy, advocacy, self-reflection, and, ultimately, better lives for our most vulnerable children.
Melissa Rodriguez holds a Bachelor of Science in Psychology from Texas State University and has over 20 years of experience in childcare services and administration. She is a Licensed Child Placing Agency Administrator, responsible for overseeing day-to-day operations and ensuring agency compliance with policies, procedures, and contract requirements, in conjunction with the Executive Director and Executive Administrator.About This Author
Melissa Rodriguez
